Skewed Lines
by Abalisk
Summary: The highly acclaimed and anticipated "Tell it to the Marines" and "Flight of the Albatross" crossover nobody asked for… A Gift for Tsume Yuki
1. Chapter 1

**A/N:** Yet again more tumblr shenanigans spawned this, there was a few months where TsumeYuki and I were bad influences on each other _hue hue hue~_

 **My Tumblr:** fanfiction-by-abalisk

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Leith scowled, glaring into the middle distance as she contemplated her predicament.

She'd been minding her own business on the _Moby Dick_ , intent on taking a nap somewhere, preferably one of the crow's nests so she could take off her shirt without any gawkers (not that she minded too much, but she liked having quiet time to herself every now and again). When suddenly her vision had gone... weird.

There really was no easy way to describe it. Wobbly? Hyperfocused? Washy? Bright? Dark? All at once?

In any case, she woke up in a place that very obviously was _not_ her ship.

More importantly, she was wrapped from leg to shoulder in a creeping vine that was intent on dragging her into some sort of pitcher plant. Upside down. Achingly slowly. Like a frog caught on a slow-motion camera.

"Balls," she growled, huffing as the vines tightened further around her arms and midsection, hoisting her another few centimeters.

If it were anyone else, the scene would probably be hilarious, and from another's point of view it probably was.

But for Leith it was just... boring. And sad.

"So this is the way I go, huh?" she asked no one in particular, trying to ignore the sticky vine that was oozing juices—which would no doubt have tried to digest her by now, if she hadn't covered herself up to her neck in Armament. Leith staunchly refused to acknowledge the plant, as the tail end slapped and stuck wetly to her cheek. "I'm gonna die as plant food, after all that bullshit..."

"Excuse me?"

Leith blinked at the interruption, a feminine voice cutting through her depressive thoughts. Glancing up—or down rather, she tilted her chin to get a glimpse of the speaker.

A young woman with bright crimson hair gave her a wave, she couldn't quite see the details of most of her face since it was in shadow from her deerstalker hat. "Are you alright?"

"Oh, you know... Just hanging around," Leith murmured, feeling snarky. She noted that her hat had survived the transfer, only it was sitting on the dirt of the jungle floor, not far from Miss Red's feet. "You mind picking that up for me? Dirt's a bitch to scrub out of the white..."

The stranger complied and padded it down to get rid of any scuffs, it probably didn't do much, but it was the thought that counted.

"Would you like some help?" Miss Red asked politely, after giving her hat the proper attention it deserved, and Leith noted there was some dry amusement behind her tone.

"Sure," Leith shrugged—well as best a shrug as she could muster—the vine was tenacious, having added a few extra loops in the middle of their conversation, "I'd rather not be the star of some weird hentai if you catch my drift."

Oddly, she did indeed seem to "catch her drift" because the choking gasp she gave was nothing but recognition.

Leith was sure the last time she checked, hentai wasn't a thing here. Sure, they had nudie mags... But every universe should have those, it was like a perverse requirement. Hentai on the other hand was an international catch-all term for anime and manga pornography from Earth... not whatever-the-fuck you'd call _One Piece_ -land.

She frowned.

I'm missing something here, she thought, giving a squeak when the vine shook violently and suddenly plummeted, the ground rising up far too quickly for her liking. Leith closed her eyes in preparation for impact...

Only for slender arms to catch her with only a grunt at the strain, Leith was mildly impressed.

As such, she gave her savior a look, intent on saying something witty like, "my hero" or anything equally asinine, only for the words to die in her throat.

Yellow, hawk-like eyes stared unflinchingly into her own.

Leith gulped. "Why Grandma, what large eyes you have..."

The woman promptly dropped her.

Guess she wasn't a fan of Grimm Tales...

xXx

"So, let me guess," Leith stated, giving the fire pit a customary poke with a stick she found, "Reincarnation?"

The red head, who'd introduced herself as simply Riskua, nodded emphatically, "How'd you guess?"

Leith snorted and motioned toward her face and eyes, "People freaking wish they could have coloration like that back home. No way in hell that's a natural thing on Earth."

Riskua nodded again, something behind her eyes clearing. She smiled and pointed at Leith's head in turn. "What about you? I'm pretty sure I remember white hair not being a commonality."

"Marie Antoinette Syndrome," Leith supplied, and when Riskua tilted her head in question, she frowned, "Probably... or it's Anime bullshit. Haven't quite figured that one out."

The red-haired woman placed her chin into her hand, staring at Leith in interest. "So you weren't born here?"

"Nope," she said with a pop, jabbing her fire brand deeper into the coals. She really didn't want to expand on this conversation, it made her want to rub at her old scars. As it was, she settled on scrubbing at the one over her nose.

"Wormhole, maybe. Or summoned in a demonic ritual—hah, that would be cool." Leith chuckled at her own joke, but the laughter was forced and half-hearted, she went back to making sparks in the fire pit, digging her branch viciously into a bed of coals. "Haven't figured that one out either. Though, I don't really get the chance to question it often, to be honest," she said soberly.

Riskua opened her mouth to ask another question when she was interrupted by the sound of rustling brush. Both women tensed as the sound drew nearer and Leith noted that the other woman reached for her daggers.

Only for Ace to stumble out of the bushes.

"Red, I—" he started off confidently, then did a double take at Leith, his expression turning baffled, before frowning in suspicion, "Who the hell are you?"

He was staring intently at Leith's right shoulder, specifically at the Whitebeard tattoo there.

Leith blinked languidly, appearing unperturbed. Though internally she was freaking the fuck out because, _What the hell, why is his tattoo different?!_ "The Queen of England, who the hell do you think?" she snarked.

Riskua gave a chuckle.

God, it felt good having someone get her jokes.

Ace apparently wasn't up for playing, because the look in his eyes became downright dangerous. "You're no Whitebeard Pirate, I've never seen you before."

The silence in the clearing was profound. Riskua was now giving her a suspicious glance.

Leith unfortunately, couldn't help but grin in response, her smile feral. "With a crew of sixteen hundred can you really say you've met everyone, Hot Stuff?"

He growled. The temperature, which was already stifling due to their jungle environment, began to rise further.

"Cool your jets, Turbo, I'm getting there," she griped, wiping the smile off her face with some effort. Leith shoved her stick into the flames, divesting herself of her only 'weapon'. Because no matter how much her bloodlust wanted her to, she wasn't going to fight two people she just met.

Especially, if those people might be the only means of her getting back to her own version of _One Piece_ -verse.

Leith thought it best to start things light.

"Hell-in-a-handbasket, it's weird seeing you with a different arm tattoo," she blurted instead, staring at the bold letters of "ASLR" on his left shoulder.

Ace's expression turned uncomprehending. "Huh?"

Okay... so maybe not as light as she thought. She was terrible at this.

"Let's try that again," she grumbled, pinching the bridge of her nose in embarrassment. She took a deep breath before opening her eyes and giving the two before her a flat stare. "Hi, my name's Leith and I happen to have had a dimension-hopping accident, please direct me to my own universe, where my own version of Ace and the Whitebeards reside."

Riskua and Ace turned to stare at one another.

"Please consider," Leith continued, giving a grimace and shooting them both a pleading look, "I'm not crazy. And please don't catch me on fire, I like my skin where it is. Thanks."


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N:** In which Leith sings some _Lifehouse - First Time_

 **Tumblr:** fanfiction-by-abalisk

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"You're insane," Ace blurted and Riskua wanted to face palm.

As it was, she settled for an armament-enhanced elbow to the man's ribs, at which he only grunted in response. Really, she loved him to death, but his level of tact was almost as bad as Luffy's sometimes.

Leith on the other hand, only appeared faintly amused, a true testament to her composure. Riskua had to wonder how often she'd been accused to practice such a state of mind.

"Nothing I haven't heard many times before," the white-haired woman murmured calmly, unwittingly answering Riskua's unasked question, her eyebrows quirking, "Though whether you believe me or not doesn't matter. The fact remains that I'm here and effectively stranded, unless someone would be so kind as to cart me off this dirt heap."

"Tch, like hell—"

"Ace..." Riskua chided.

"What?" he retorted shortly, only to shoot her a disbelieving look, "You— _Seriously?_ You believe this crap?"

She could understand his suspicions, and Riskua would have been just as skeptical as he was if she hadn't known Leith was from her world. Her _old world_. Earth. It felt so strange to think of it after so long, she'd been so busy with everything here that she'd put all those memories on the back burner.

But now, the very thought ached.

The sheer variety of music. The crackle of the radio as it played in the car. The Internet. Phones...

 _There's so much I miss,_ Riskua thought, locking eyes with Leith, who stared staunchly back without so much as a flinch.

She had so many questions.

"Ace, I've been talking with her for a while now and she hasn't made any move to hurt me," Riskua stated, leaning back on her palms and giving him a wry look, "Hell, before you came barging in she was ready to fight to defend us both, so I think we should at least give her the benefit of the doubt."

Ace just stared at her like she'd grown a second head.

Leith shrugged, an amused smile worming its way across her face. "If that doesn't do it for ya, I play a mean guitar," she added hopefully, her hazel eyes sparkling.

xXx

" _We're both looking for something  
We've been afraid to find  
It's easier to be broken  
It's easier to hide~"_

Riskua just allowed herself to feel the steady strum of the guitar, the dulcet tones of Leith's voice flowing through the lyrics like water.

When she'd initially asked for a cover, Leith hadn't been immediately familiar with the song by name. But the moment she saw the lyrics Riskua memorized by heart, she picked it up with a startling earnestness.

" _I'm feeling alive all over again  
As deep as the sky under my skin  
Like being in love, she said, for the first time  
Maybe I'm wrong, I'm feeling right  
Wherever I belong with you tonight  
Like being in love to feel for the first time~"_

Riskua smiled, playing with Ace's hair as he rested his head on her stomach. He'd mellowed out after her exuberant acceptance of Leith upon learning she could play guitar and sing, apparently he didn't have the heart to refuse after that display. It really was endearing. She truly loved him.

But Riskua just _had_ to take Leith with them. To introduce her to the crew on the Sunny. To gossip about the things they miss from Earth. To gush about their adventures. To let Sabo hear this...

" _We're crashing  
Into the unknown  
We're lost in this  
But it feels like home~"_

And yeah, maybe no one would really understand why she latched on so fiercely to this strange woman. But having a little slice of an old life, of something from home, couldn't hurt.

'Feels like home' indeed.


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N:** And thus, Leith plays matchmaker~

 **Song included:** _Witcher 3 OST - The Wolven Storm (Priscilla's Song)_

 **Tumblr:** fanfiction-by-abalisk

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"You know, if I'm cock-blocking you, all you gotta do is say..."

Ace spit out the water he'd been drinking all over Sabo in his surprise, the blond in question giving a loud protest at the unjustified treatment.

Leith smirked that damnable smile of hers, all teeth and looking absolutely wicked as she strummed a slow tune over her guitar strings. "It's not as sexy as a saxophone, but~" she paused, then stroked a loving few chords, the sound tender, "It does the job of setting the mood."

She sent a significant glance in the direction Riskua had wandered off to, flicking her eyes back to pin Ace with a knowing look, her eyes reflecting the firelight.

Ace flushed hot at her insinuation. "I... that's–"

"She's been shooting you doe eyes ever since I started playing the wistful stuff," Leith interrupted, ignoring Sabo when he made a choking noise, "I've set the stage, darling, you just gotta bust a move."

He sucked in a breath, his heart thundering in his chest. _There's no way I can do that, she wouldn't ever—_

"You never know until you try," she murmured, as if reading his thoughts. She did that a lot... it was a bit disconcerting. "You can tell her that Double-O-Seven and I went off for a stroll," Leith continued, already standing, her fingers still fiddling with her guitar strings in that nearly melancholy lilt, "Lots of room to wander on an island this size..."

Then she sang, her voice higher than it had been before:

" _These scars long have yearned for your tender caress  
To bind our fortunes, damn what the stars own  
Rend my heart open, then your love profess  
A winding weaving fate to which we both atone~"_

She trailed off and began humming under her breath, still strumming her guitar. Ace felt a lump in his throat as he watched her sway away.

He was shocked when Sabo stood to follow her, giving him an encouraging pat on his shoulder. "You have my blessing," Sabo grinned, winking before scrambling away, his coattails flying as he followed Leith's song.

Ace gulped, sinking further into into his seat.

xXx

"I can't figure you out."

Leith hummed noncommittally in response, placing her guitar gently against a boulder. Sabo blinked at her, deeply suspicious despite her chivalrous action toward furthering his two best friends' affections. He couldn't fathom why she'd do it.

He didn't want to see her help bring them together, only to tear them apart.

"Isn't Ace important to you?" Sabo accused, watching as she inspected the pool with a dip of her toe.

" _My_ Ace is important to me," she informed him, untying her sash languidly, and then discarding it carelessly with a snap of fabric, "There's a difference."

Sabo tilted his hat down, frowning. "How so?"

She shrugged, kicking off her shoes so they came to rest next to her guitar, then motioned to the clear spring beside them, "When you look at the water, what do you see?"

He blinked, suddenly feeling like he was sitting in a philosophy seminar with Dragon again. Sabo stared at the rippling pool his eyes darting over the features. The obvious one is the water itself, so she must mean... "Reflection," he said, staring at the oval shape of the full moon rippling across the water.

"Exactly," Leith praised, gathering up her hair and twisting it about to make a messy bun, "Like reflections in a pond, we aren't seeing our true selves. The silt and the imperfections in light distort the vision, making it merely a shadow of what it once was." She smiled, and Sabo was suddenly struck at how... wise she looked. "That is what your Ace is to me."

Then she shrugged off her shirt.

Sabo coughed and turned away politely, his face flushing despite having seen Riskua and Koala do the same thing numerous times. Only... this was practically a stranger, one that he'd just accused of trying to sabotage his friends' budding relationship.

People in that sort of dynamic usually didn't just get naked in front of each other.

Not usually anyway.

"What are you doing?" he asked stiffly, trying to hide the nervousness in his voice. Listening intently as the rustle of clothing ceased.

"Going for a swim, want to join me?" she replied, her voice sultry, the sound of water sloshing as she doubtlessly dipped her leg in.

 _God, yes,_ Sabo thought, already reaching for his cravat when a stray thought struck him. He frowned. Pausing. "Are you trying to seduce me, young lady?"

"Ohh~ Taking an authoritative tone," Leith purred, and Sabo had to fight down the pleasant shiver at the sound, she really knew how to throw her voice. Even the hairs on the nape of his neck were standing on end. "What are you going to do if I am, mister?"

Sabo gulped. "I thought you and... your Ace–"

Leith sighed, a highly frustrated noise. "Mention that you share a bed for nightmares and everyone assumes your fucking..." she grumbled, mostly to herself it seemed.

Whipping around, Sabo pinned her with a wide-eyed look. At first, it was to stare at her in surprise, but then it devolved into shamelessly admiring how her hair and skin shimmered in the moonlight.

She looked like some sort of water spirit.

"So... you aren't–"

"Ugh," she snorted ungracefully, rolling her eyes, "Damn it all, _no!_ Do you even know how much tail that bastard gets?" Leith groaned, the sound faintly lewd considering their topic of conversation and her state of undress. "I don't know how many times I've been left high and dry because he scared someone off from me, only to traipse away with some bimbo."

Sabo could sympathize. "I'm sorry that... sounds frustrating."

Leith glared at him, the look so wickedly predatory that he felt a thrill go straight to his groin. She crooked a finger at him enticingly, "Get over here, Mister Bond, and I'll show you just how frustrating it is."

He still didn't know what she meant by these nicknames, but that was irrelevant.

Never let it be said he turned down a challenge.


	4. Chapter 4

**A/N:** And of course, Ace decides to be a child about things.

 **Tumblr:** fanfiction-by-abalisk

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He didn't like it. Not one bit.

Another round of giggles echoed from the _Moby Dick's_ figurehead and Ace felt a tingle down his spine at the sound. Whipping around, he glowered at the pair of women sunning themselves, heads of red and white sitting opposite each other in stark contrast like chess pieces.

Riskua was doing that talking-with-her-hands thing she does when she gets really into a topic. Ace longed to spend time with her...

Only...

A raucous cackle burst out of the white-haired woman, Leith, and Ace couldn't help but wince at the noise. She really didn't have an attractive laugh; as with everything else in her personality it was harsh and crass, nothing at all like Riskua. He still couldn't understand what she saw in her.

Whatever it was they talked about though, they never shared with anyone else, and Ace couldn't help but feel a pang of jealousy at the thought. Riskua was supposed to spend time with him (and to a lesser extent, Sabo) during the two years away from the Straw Hats, not with this weird woman that showed up out of nowhere claiming to be from another version of their world.

He still didn't believe that crap.

He still felt a little betrayed when Pops simply greeted her with open arms.

"You know if you pine any more you're going to grow roots..."

Speaking of betrayal...

"Sabo," Ace grunted, glaring out over the water so that neither women could catch him burning holes into the back of their heads and to avoid looking at his traitor of a brother. "What do you want?"

"Still giving me the cold shoulder?" his brother asked, hopping up to sit along the railing and giving him a wry grin, "Come on, Ace, it was a one time thing."

"You still slept with a possible enemy," he growled, flushing as he remembered the state he and Riskua caught them in. He was never going to be able to scrub that image from his brain was he?

Sabo, instead of looking appropriately abashed, grinned widely. "Nothing I haven't done before," he admitted with an eyebrow wiggle and Ace gagged.

"Gross."

"Oh, _come on!_ " Sabo groaned, throwing his hands into the air, "Don't be such a brat. Look..." Here, Sabo jabbed him in the chest with a haki enhanced finger so he couldn't avoid it. "How about we talk about what's _really_ bothering you?"

Ace blinked, nonplussed at the fierce look his brother was giving him.

"You're pissed off that Ri is spending more time with Leith than with you," Sabo accused, "And don't try to deny it, it's obvious," he interrupted when Ace went to open his mouth in protest.

Clicking his jaw shut, Ace grit his teeth, letting all of his denials die out.

Because as usual, his brother was right.

"And really," Sabo continued, crossing his arms to give him a flat look, "I can kinda see where you're coming from. But whatever it is they talk about... It's really made Ri happy."

xXx

"God, I miss my phone so much," Riskua lamented, flopping back onto the towel, "Oh, and the internet, _gah!_ "

Leith chortled, her legs kicking back and forth behind her as she lounged on her belly. She'd opted not to remove her shirt like the red-head had, not wanting any questions about the marks on her back. With Sabo it'd been too dark to see the white lines, but here in daylight they would be a bit too obvious, and she didn't want to bring down the mood by having to explain _that_ particular can of worms.

"You know what I miss the most?" Leith asked, fiddling with the edge of her towel and pulling out some stray threads.

Riskua hummed in question.

"Porn."

As Riskua proceeded to choke on her own spit, Leith furrowed her brows before planting her palm against her cheek in thought. "Though, now that I think about it, I guess there's also easy mac and cheese. I freakin' miss the hell out of that too. And Vodka... And those little ice cream sandwich things... And Pokemon... Peanut Butter... hmmm..."

Leith pursed her lips as she mused, her pinky playing with her bottom lip, before she finally gave up and shrugged. "Alright, fuck it! So maybe porn's not at the top, but it's certainly on the list. My imagination only goes so far."

Riskua giggled, her hand covering her mouth. It was cute really. Those yellow eyes of hers warmed into a honey color when she smiled. "You're awful," she teased, shoving Leith's shoulder.

"Eh, well, if you spend too much time caring what other people think, you'll never have fun," Leith retorted, grinning all the while.

"How very Luffy of you," Riskua snarked, before her expression sobered a little. "Do you ever miss... your family?" she asked, following a pattern on the deck with her fingertip.

 _Oof._

Leith grimaced. "I'm gonna need at least a dozen drinks in me before we start that topic, doll."


	5. Chapter 5

**Anonymous:**  
 _"I can ́t help but thinking what the reactions would have been if Leith wound up with Sabo ́s kid and it only is found out afterwards, when she is "back" again."_

 **Tumblr:** fanfiction-by-abalisk

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"Run that by me again..." Ace murmured faintly, his freckles standing out just a little bit more on his pallid face.

Leith took a deep breath, trying to keep calm as another wave of nausea hit her. This wasn't looking to be going well, and her nervousness was making her morning sickness worse. She only hoped she didn't embarrass herself by barfing all over Ace as an extra bonus to an already awful morning.

"Remember when I disappeared into an astral gate for a few months?" she asked, crossing her arms.

Ace's expression twisted in confusion. "Uh... yeah. And you said you met like... an alternate version of me," he stated, looking away for a moment and twiddling his thumbs, "And that Sabo was alive."

"Right," Leith confirmed, nodding her head– then immediately aborting the action because, Oh, gonna hurl! "Well, the thing is, other-Sabo and I..."

When she trailed off, Ace's eyes widened in a combination of dawning understanding and— _was that horror?_ "You've got to be kidding me."

"Would I be puking my guts out every morning if I were?" Leith muttered sarcastically, swallowing thickly as her throat constricted again. "Pitch confirmed what I already know and well... Other-Sabo was the only one I've been with in years, so all arrows point to him being the lucky guy."

"But that's just..." Ace trailed off, running a hand through his bangs, a far away look on his eyes, " _Weird._ Why would you do that?"

Leith snorted, amused. "Well~ he was a grown man and _very_ well-proportioned..." At his gag, she huffed. "Honestly, you're taking this much better than I thought you would, I was expecting more... screaming."

"Wait for the shock to set in, then I'll show you screaming," he growled, eyebrow twitching.

xXx

 **Bonus Scene:**

Sabo blinked down at the baby.

The baby blinked back.

"Why am I looking at a mini-me?" he asked, his voice faint as he gazed at his infant replica.

The boy gave a happy burble, a bubble of spit popping between his lips. His fat little legs kicking in the white-haired woman's arms.

She laughed nervously. "Well, that's a funny story, involving some... time travel and uh... space shenanigans. Portals and such." A cough. She scratched her head, eyes darting around. "Uhm..." she said, seeming unsure, before giving a wane smile and holding up the baby as if to hand it to him. "Congrats it's a boy?"

Sabo paled.


End file.
